My Experiences as a Involuntary Subject of Directed Energy Weapons
The Terrorists Upstairs
EMF Account 6
Early Days mid-1999 to Oct. 2001
Pre-assaultive Phase, Nov. 2001-April 14, 2002
Sleepless in Seattle
Who Fixed My Car?
A Sometimes Girlfriend (Ms. C)
Who Has Been In My Apartment?
Who Has Been in My PC?
The Assaultive Phase, April 15, 2002 - June 19, 2002
The No Outcome Standoff
Back to Work
Cooked at Work
Human Resources is Here to Help You
You Are Safe in the Loony Bin
Stealth Phase; June 19 to Oct. 2002
Magnetic Machinations Update (12-2002)
New apartment, Oct. 2002
More Driving Headpain: Nov., Dec. 2002
Betrayed by Family Quislings (12-2002)
Merry Christmas 2002
Laser Lashings (07-2003)
Curent State Wrap Up (09-2003)
Summary: Musings on the Experimental Objective (07-2003)
Summary: Musings on a Conspiracy (07-2003)
Summary: Technical Observations/Harassment Techniques (07-2003)
Remote Brain Monitoring and Dithering
Remote Object Manipulation
Electronic Object Intrusion
Sudden Guest Appearences
No Privacy for Four+ years
Object Quantization and Directed Irradiation
Surveillance is Complete
Pollution of all Friends and Family
Summary: Health (07-2003)
Summary: Conclusion (09-2003)
This is a detailed account of what I experienced, and for those who are versed in this kind of covert harassment activity may want to go directly to the "Summary:" sections. This is the third re-write in 10 months, and my apologies if the document contains some repetition between early and later sections. I have consolidated and summarized the considerable writings of my journals, partly as an exercise for me to work through my own material, and as it now turns out, as a backup because some 11 journals have recently gone missing (06-2003). And I have the fond, but doubtless vain hope, that by exposing this criminality and its methods (to the limited extent that I know), that the harassors will pack up and go.
The intended audience is anyone who has an interest in covert injury and or harassment applied to involuntary test subjects. Many of the events are supported by a train of detailed evidence which would be too onerous to detail here. However, I will freely communicate with those that I trust should a need arise for elaboration. Another audience is those who can offer assistance in the form of helping me get this monkey off my back. It is truly a personal hell on several levels: 1) my immediate family is knowledgeable of the source and nature of this harassment 2) physicians and other care-givers have not even enquired into the validity of my account, when in fact the tenets of this kind of experience have all been documented decades ago. The sum total of all the "followers" and other harassors must total in the thousands now, and I have no idea of what game I have been placed into, though there seems to be a definite objective.
There have been many unhelpful listeners in my support circle who are running interference by pretending to forget the detail that supports my interpretations of the events I describe below. My interpretations are open to re-interpretation by the reader as long as all the facts remain in alignment which the unhelpful, now so-called support circle, do not subscribe to. I don't consider negating or plain refuting events as constructive, and would consider such as spurious meddling. Unfortunately this has been the habit of the clinical community, who have uniformly gone for the blinkers-on diagnosis, and in doing so, severely compromised my treatment for Attention Deficit Disorder and thwarted any forward progress in attaining its amelioration.
Beyond my own health concerns and exasperation of this directed harassment, I have absolutely no interest in Directed Energy Weapons (DEWs). I only ended up being involved in this because I have been assaulted and harassed by them, or something of its kind. It is no coincidence that the accounts of others have a high degree of correlation with my own (see www.raven1.net). Nor do I have any (current) interest in following the chain of this criminality to the greater picture of the New World Order and/or the Illuminati. I just want these clinical terrorists out of my life for good.
Why did they pick me? Some thoughts; I live alone, I am a Canadian resident with a temporary US working TN visa, and I have ADD which serves as a psychiatric "cover" on which to assign the symptoms of harassment. That's a good start, and it served the harassors all the more when my clinical care ordered an MRI scan and an ambulatory EEG. Both tests were negative. Possibly my recent dental images have be used as well. Some US surveillance agencies are not permitted by law to cover (or harass) US citizens living in the US. For the most part though, the laws of either country have been totally immaterial to the activities of these cursed harassors. I sincerely doubt that I have had any privacy in the last four years, and that everything I've said or done has been recorded; how else can they protect the guilty (quislings) when I am freely associating with them? And last but not least, my family capitulated and enjoined this criminality, and it is they who have cast me into this relentless pit torture and harassment. They will never be forgiven.
Other brief biographic details are that I am 49 yo (07-2003), and I have no military or law enforcement background or contacts. I am a law abiding individual, and do not engage in any suspicious activities.
Early Days mid-1999 to Oct. 2001
I moved to Everett WA from Victoria BC Canada in July 1999. At this time I was separating from my wife, also would also visit my daughter and attend to property maintenance. I began work for a company CGF (an alias) under a TN working visa, which is good for one year, though they can be re-granted if the employer's paperwork is in order. I became friendly with one co-worker in particular, BT who was kind enough to show me the ropes of the workplace and the American way of doing things, which of course, have a slightly different spin than in Canada. He and I shared similar perspectives and he left CGF for JEZ (an alias) in downtown Seattle in early 2000. He persuaded me to work for him in May and with the added incentive of a salary increase, and more interesting work prospects, and I had no hesitation in making the switch to a new employer.
This period was uneventful by any other measure, though there were a few anomalies in hindsight. One, I lost my wallet at the last show in a nearby cinema, and did not find it on my immediate return to the parking area, and nor did the cinema operators find it when I phoned at opening time the next day. The other was that I was randomly searched at the US border and as per the US Customs prerogative; I declared my medications when the officer asked, as the law requires that they should be in their appropriate containers. I should note that the selection method did appear random to me at the time or in hindsight, as an officer came from the main office, rather than being directed from an inspection station. Also of interest, was an apartment fire that was one floor below, and three away which I detected by the smell creeping into my room and causing me to wake up, and upon inspection, I was extremely panicked and apprehensive. I now suspect the perpetrators had some kind of device to read my primal anxiety neural circutry because they later played me like a fiddle by inducing this same emotion state.
Another minor mention is that I had some dental work in the form of crowns done during this period, and there is every good chance that multiple dental implants are the method by which they can quickly assemble
At this time I was struggling to get properly treated for Attention Deficit Disorder, and it was quite a push to find a knowledgeable doctor, though I was being treated for low grade depression, but the medications were not successful. I now suspect there were two bought and paid for physicians who attempted to divert me from determining the proper diagnosis.
From May through to Oct. 2000 I commuted on the bus from Everett to Seattle, and it was there I met Ms C. We had an on/off relationship, on account of unbridgeable differences, though there was sufficient commonality to stay within each other's orbits. My move into downtown Seattle in Oct. 2000 expedited the "off" portion of our association. What I did find, dating anew, was that I had a terrible time keeping time commitments and estimating travel time, though sometimes I wonder if someone hadn't turned on the "dither" frequency on me, as there is an eerie consistency I have with this new found bad habit when seeing Ms C. In any event, such habits meant that I wasn't ready for prime time dating, and that I had better apply myself to get better.
As a natural part of our working relationship and friendship, BT and I would often lunch together and do other weekday "bonding" activities like touring the better stores to shop. BT has an easy going conversational manner such that people open up to him, and I was no exception. This easy going relational style persisted most of the time, and he and I would often talk about our respective "women" issues for mutual gain and camaraderie.
The year 2000 was relatively uneventful from any kind of surveillance/harassment perspective as I saw it. Of possible connection was that my doctor ordered an MRI scan for a potential pituitary gland problem in Nov. 2000 based on a low testosterone. My mood was still low, torporous in fact, and the end of the work day seemed to bring this on regularly, though I had started on stimulant for ADD. It was a big helper, and is one of the most successful medications I take, that is, when I can now. Most ADD specialists are not afraid to prescribe a stimulant, and will publicly state that they are "safer than penicillin", as they have done more than once in the presentations I have been to. At this time, there were still difficulties in "getting my act together" and cognitive problems which became more prevalent and prompted me to seek more expert advice.
I sought a SPECT scan in March 2001 at a specialty ADD clinic, and I was officially diagnosed with ADD, just as I had been telling the clinicians for the previous 3 years. I came back armed with a number of medication recommendations though one of those took me into a lower mood state (apparently) and caused me to be less capable, and it took two months to figure that out and another 4 months to pull out the hole it had dug. By my standards of being a "quick responder" this was an inordinant amount of time. As part of carrying on with getting better, I selected a doctor, Dr N, who shared a much more quantitative approach to evaluation, though in time, it became problematic. As part of his evaluation he ordered a weekend long ambulatory EEG, which is normally used to detect seizures, and the result was negative.
It was May 2001 that I attended the national ADDA (Attention Deficit Disorder Association) conference in Seattle, and it was there I met Ms L, who had ADD also. She had a quirky but intellectual style, and was a consummate consumer of knowledge about ADD, and as a vital part of this condition, one comes to trust others relatively quickly so to learn about support groups, effective doctors and treatment medications possibilities . We built up a close relationship around this, and freely exchanged information, and especially so in advance of doctor visits to strategize and consolidate one's position for maximum return on the time invested.
We would always discuss my visits to Dr N in advance, as he seemed to be erratic at times; he was a lab-rat/pharmaceutical type, and not adequately assessing how the patient is functioning. He had contrary views on my stimulant prescription, but no wisdom or alternatives to offer as to the reason of its effectiveness for me. His attempts at persisting in other medications were at times dangerous, as I was sometimes off the only medication that was singularly effective. Dr N became frustrating,- he would have a leading edge medication that was promising, then he would sit back for 3 months promoting something that was mutually understood to be ineffective. On two occasions, when I was full of vexation and intended to tell him that I had enough, I seemed to fall under his spell, and lose my oppositional vigor and fail to make any supporting points of my argument. It has never happened before, and as my perspective on the pervasive nefariousness has matured, it would seem to me that a likely scenario was that he had been tipped off as to my intentions, and there had been some kind of "dithering" laser or other type of irradiative device that caused me to be dazed by his song and dance routine. But it should be said, leading from this period, is that whoever introduced the irradiative harassment into my life, has had excellent clinical knowledge to ensure that it was introduced gradually, and that I didn't notice.
It was during the course of having, and then tapering off a depressogenic medication that I suspect the irradiative surveillance and harassment began.The only other minor noteworthy item that signposted dysfunction at this time was my attempt to get ready for the US National long course (50 m) Masters Swimming meet in nearby Tacoma in August 2001. Although I had not actively swum for 6 months on a regular basis, but had been a 10 year , 3 times per week swimmer (2500m/hour workout), I found I did not have the usual stamina by a considerable margin, and gave up on my plans.
Pre-assaultive Phase, Nov. 2001-April 14, 2002
Sleepless in Seattle
As June rolled around into October, I found myself still struggling with mood, unable to attain appropriate energy and fighting off Dr N's diversionary (my speculation) medications. Increasing the dose of stimulant helped for a time, then it dropped off in short order which was unexpected,- it should of plateaued for 6 or more months. Though it should be said that I did tolerate it very well, and in hindsight has caused me to think that there may of been some kind of deleterious irradiative energies applied to me as early as June 2001. My recent experience (11-2002) of being on this medication anew, though at much reduced dosages, leads me to now believe that much of my dysfunction was externally induced, by whatever means and was not attributable to the medication.
I can only assume November 2001 was the onset of a new phase of the DEW harassment, though with some clues (above) going back to 06-2001, because there were a few coincident and odd events. One, my two-month electrical power bill shot up from 400 mwh to 700 mwh, and as I will detail below, there appeared to be some illegal "power-sharing". It was at this time I renewed my lease, fatefully as it turned out, for a full 12 months. Also at this time, the building exterior maintenance was near completion, and there was scaffolding in front of my window for 4 weeks. Once removed, I noticed a new installation of parabolic dish on the opposite of the courtyard that seemed, by my unpracticed eye, to be pointing directly at this apartment or perhaps the one above. The central window gasket hung down for some unknown reason. Likely this was the main entry route for some modifications to my apartment noted below.
It was about this time that I became a late night internet junkie. I would not, could not, go to bed before 2 am every night, though I felt relatively ready to begin the day at 7:30. I was a little ragged in the morning, but my prescribed stimulant for Attention Deficit Disorder got me back into the swim of things. It was the first time ever I could not will myself to change a bad habit. I blamed the stimulant at the time, but this is debatable in hindsight: one, I can go to sleep very nicely while on stimulant as its stimulantive properties are atypical for those with ADD, second, this occurred with absolute consistency every day, -my system does not run this way, third, I could not will myself to change for the first time ever, fourth, although a late night owl, I was never this bad. It was the cummulation of this sleeplessness and related exacerbations that were the underlying need for me to seek later refuge in short term disability coverage April 25, and then a hospital stay beginning May 02.
Other ADD-like behaviors that seemed to have a new life were aphasia (lack of word meaning) and constantly not getting my act together (apathy) which worsened over this time. Another set of symptoms was that I didn’t feel hungry at anytime (highly unusual), and this was not a medication induced symptom, as I mentioned, the medications normalized me. Subsequent lower doses did not cause the sensation of hunger to return.
Other odd items were the smell of paint in the apartment when I returned from work in February - March. Another was both door locks had been locked (same key) when I only use one, signifying entry by some other party. The venetian blind louvers took on some inexplicable dimpling, and some were bent, all on their own it seemed. Someone had affixed nylon ties to the loose leads of my cable lamp system. Each night I went to bed, no matter the time, there was the sound of wires scrapping against the wall. I always took this to be the next-door apartment owner pulling his alarm clock out, but this always occurred at my bedtime. I have since concluded this must of been magnetic irradiation being applied to me that also caused the internal wall wiring to flip about, as I now encounter this frequently with non-rigid items in my apartment. Also, the fridge seemed to become louder, and the adjacent elevator humming noise seemed to be more continuous. These events built up anxiety about who was entering my apartment for what reason, as nothing had been taken.
2) Employment Ructions
I overheard, or more likely, was meant to overhear as my cubicle was outside the manager's office, that "I have no use for (my name) once the data model is done" in early April, and later heard "big changes coming", then overheard, "layoffs....(my name)" through the wall of the manager's office. A re-organization was slated for April 15 (a Monday). Sometime around April 10, my work colleagues were looking at me with abject horror, as if I had committed some unspeakable sin. Likewise, my apartment manager gave me the same look. It was baffling, though I had become resigned to the "layoff".
On the Friday, April 12, my former boss, BT, with whom I was on friendly terms, invoked a ruse to go shopping at a deli late work time on Friday. During our trip to the deli, and then back to work to dine, and then a walk back to his car (near my place), he seemed to disappear a couple of times. Subsequent to each disappearance, his line of questioning seemed to change. I just thought it was odd, as it wasn't like him. It caused me to ponder if there was a corporate layoff event in the offing, or if it was a "me-only" event.
3) Who Fixed My Car?
My car would always clunk going around the tight corners in the apartment-parking garage, though I had it checked out, there was nothing wrong in the estimation of the mechanics. I drove out to a Sometimes Girlfriend, Ms. C, and my car handled totally differently. It was tighter, and made no clunking sounds going around tight corners. I was immediately suspicious, but again baffled as to who would fix my car without authorization.
Upon inspection the next day, the tie rod (rubber) boots were new. A front-end shop later verified the replacement of the tie rod ends. Also, I found the jack to be misplaced, the jack attachment point crushed and the "Wipe-its" were placed in the jack storage are when they had been in the glove box. There were splatter marks on the headliner in the car, near the cargo area of the station wagon, as if a wet dog had shaken. Obviously someone took the car and had a breakdown and got it repaired. My current analysis (07-2003) was that my vehicle was taken to a shop where a number of modifications were made to ensure that I could be irradiated while in the vehicle. In late 2002 it was not uncommon for me to see lasers pulsing at my feet, experienceing laser strikes to my face, and to be painfully irradiated in the head while in transit. As part of the aforementioned front end work, there were a number of repairs; tires, steering rack, ball joint, and the entire front end geometry was out of alignment. All this cost me >$2500, and my notion is that the successive magnetization (i.e. external irradiation while driving) pulled the entire front end out of alignment. Even now, the brake rotors make a strange sound after driving for some distance.
4) A Sometimes Girlfriend (Ms. C)
I can't recall the precise details of why I came to develop a notion of my e-mail being monitored at work and at home. The behaviors of my former boss (above) seemed to be changed in response to a personal e-mail to Ms C. My phones had been making odd sounds from time to time. When I went to visit her Saturday night (April 13), I already was quite suspicious of my e-mail and phones, suspicious of my vehicle being tampered with, and frazzled about my impending employment status. By my ignorance and unawareness, she managed to elicit my method of detecting apartment entry, but for her part, there were a number of statements which seemed to indicate that she knew more than she let on. In the course of the evening she invoked a "oops, I didn't mean to say that" on four occasions, and even suggested that the layoffs were more about me, again followed by an "oops". She seemed to be behaving oddly that night, and was overly compliant. This set up anxiety which later the next day attained fever pitch.
It should be noted that later observations about the effects of magnetic radiation, or at least the variety directed at me, will make me anxious with repeated inundations, and the 6 month (at least) lead time of being irradiated was a significant contributor to my state of being anxious. I have since had a repeat experience which was induced by a number of consecutive days of night-time irradiation, possibly to specific neural locations.
In 2002 she aided the other side by supplying me with light deadening clothing from her thrift store finds. I even lost a $400 coat burned by a lit candle near the entrance door to her house. Her dog would always go beserk when I entered, and in this case I put my coat down (or was I mind controlled?) and it "seemed" to land on a burning candle which ruined it. That these harassors can control gravity and other fundamental properties was not news to me since April 15 2002, and in this case I suspect they controlled the coat's fall from the nearby stair and directed it onto the candle, causing a burn. Another one of Ms. C's thrift store finds replaced it three weeks later, but interestingly enough it had a fuzzy non-reflecting liner. This, and a few other similar events gives me reason to believe that the harassors prefer to their subjects to wear light deadening clothing, even if its the liner.
5) Who Has Been In My Apartment?
On my return, I found that someone had rifled through my apartment. The telephone and computer wires and electrical boxes were dislodged, the PC print paper had been moved, some art nude prints had been moved, there was an ink stain on the vinyl floor protector by the PC, videos had been dislodged, my clothes had been moved as in a search, empty pill bottles were missing, the phones sounded "cleaner". My will, no less, was marked with a plastic tab in the file cabinet. Mighty curious. When I phoned the Sometimes Girlfriend about the apartment entry, the first thing she asked was "what were the locks like?". I told her about my vehicle's new driving characteristics, and assuming that it occurred over the visitation night, she said, "that wasn't supposed to happen" (then when?). More "oops" recoveries.
By now I was in a total state of panic. This was too big to be an employer's initiative, though it seemed to be aided by my employer, but what on earth had I done? Judging by the horrified faces at work I was deemed to have done something truly unforgivable, but it seemed most odd that the police would accuse someone prior to making a charge. But then again, I was woefully ignorant of police investigation methods. In the course of being an internet junkie, I had visited porn sites, but only the public tour galleries, none of the member-only stuff, and norI did I not have any kind of adult id card.My thoughts churned all day long and into the night as to what this "takedown" was all about. I never did get my income tax done as I was trying to put all the facts together, each time in different ways.
6) Who Has Been in My PC?
Sometime later in the day it occurred to me that my PC had been co-opted for illegal use by other parties. Oddly enough, there were users I hadn't heard have with wide sweeping authority, e.g. making files available for the internet. I attempted to delete them, the files and yet they popped back up. Even with administrator privilege, I couldn't get rid of some files and users. As I was finishing up, I noticed two people standing in an overlooking balcony, seeming to be looking in on my activities. By now, my state of anxiety was at a feverish level.
I had no idea as to how I was being monitored, but around midnight I took the PC apart and took the "offending" hard drive out, took it down to my car with my gym bag and medications and disposed of the drive on the way to 24 hr Fitness. At the 24 Hr Fitness window counter I wrote about all the odd occurrences in my diary, with my car parked outside. At about 2 am a vehicle pulls up beside mine, and the driver leans over to look in, then backs up and disappears out of sight. Some 20 minutes later, three guys walk in independently and began working out on the treadmill and orbital trainer. They seemed to be making a poor do of it, as from what I could tell they each seemed to have a holster on, and didn't want to expose this. On my return to my locker, I found out that my medications were not there, though everything else was. I left to return to my apartment and the medications had reappeared. This was most odd, as I singularly remembered to put them in my gym bag.
I decided that whatever I had done, it was going to be too big and complicated to continue and I wrote up a long suicide note. This was about 5 am when I finished. Upon searching through my apartment I noted that a paper, "The Neurotoxicity of Amphetamines", some 20 pages, was not in my briefcase as it had been for the last week. The electrical cords were missing. The cordless phone aerial was in the up position when it had been placed in a horizontal position earlier. Recall that the medications had reappeared too. Someone had been through my apartment again. Ever more heightened anxiousness.
The only suicide method that occurred to me then was the stimulant, which I took, though in hindsight, an insufficient quantity. Chances are it could have been altered too or that passing out was externally induced. As a hindsight supposition; I was likely subject to some kind of DEW device irradiation for some 6 months previous, maybe only at night time, but I have found that anxiousness can be turned on within about 3 nights of unprotected sleep. I have also found there is a generalized nervous system damage and one makes very short view decisions. Certainly the sleep deprivation seemed to be controlled and the agitation level was at a fever pitch and these both impaired my judgment.
The Assaultive Phase, April 15, 2002 - June 19, 2002
1) The No Outcome Standoff or the Razzle-Dazzle Show
I still have a vague recollection of someone carrying me and laying me down on the place on the floor where I had lapsed into unconsciousness. But I have even a more vivid memory of something unseen prompting me, all of me, to get up, which I did with a snap. Recall that I had ingested some 300 mg of stimulant (ostensibly) and that I was in a "sped up" state. I was hyper alert but coherent of speech and thought. As I failed in my primary suicide attempt (stimulant overdose) my plan was then, to get killed in the expected police shootout. Not that I had a gun, but only a mock weapon in the form of a metal brake vacuum pump. (It had a gun-like form, and I kept it shrouded with a towel to prevent anyone discerning its true unthreatening nature). Needless to say the plan didn't work for reasons that will become clear.
I will spare the chronological order of events, and list them off as I recall them:
sounds of people walking with heavy boots outside my door, sound of (police) dogs and their restraining chains being rattled, the door moved laterally within the door jam, there were fleeting shadows at the corner of my eyes, causing me to turn, thinking that something was approaching, there were bright laser spots appearing on the walls, the clothes iron steamed on its own accord, a 5' tall cabinet leaned over by 1.5 ft and stayed suspended, there were laser based apparitions of trailing lines that quickly disappeared once they diverted my attention, objects crept across the floor on their own accord, the venetian blinds lowered and raised on their own accord, there was a laser based apparition of a stream of "micro-wigglers", there were screwdrivers that bent over double, a metal Ikea clothes rack folded like it had been sawn and then resurrected itself, the clock radio display blinked on and off, and the display of brown colored lasers that were extremely fatiguing.
At the end of it all, I "surrendered", gave up, but no law enforcement agency personnel arrived! I had heard voices, boots walking outside, dogs been unchained, and yet know one came to either arrest me or otherwise declare themselves. Was I mystified or what?
How much of this was induced by stimulant and how much were the DEW terrorists displaying their technical prowess I did not know at the time. I had no doubt that I saw these strange things, but these things were quite unusual and I didn't mention them to anyone. The clinical folks would say it was all delusional, but with hindsight, I what I experienced was either real, or else was projected onto my retina (they can do this). I have never been psychotic, there is no family history of psychosis, its highly unusual to develop anew at age 48 and I tolerate stimulant medication very well. Many of these strange phenomenon have come back to visit me, though in a muted form. I just wish I was not so agitated in leading up to this, and taken the calm route with the mindset of "arrest me", or 'lay me off" or whatever was supposed to transpire. As noted above, they likely "re-played" or stimulated my anxiety centers in my brain remotely.
Originally I thought the standoff lasted from 5 am (finishing the note) to 3:30 pm, but in hindsight I estimate it was about 3 hours. I did not have my watch on, though it was on when I slipped into unconsciousness. So where did those intervening 6-7 hours go, and how were they spent? I do not know for sure, but am sure there were plenty of possibilties to obtain accurate biometric data, and possibly some kind of visual/sensed signature. I still have no idea how they detect me with such rapidity and consistency, though I am sure they have many methods.
2) Back to Work
My former boss, BT, with whom I was on good terms with, was hugely interested in how I spent April 15 (Monday) even though I did not report to him, or have any close working relationship at the time; he had a pen on his V-neck sweater and I asked him if was bugged; naturally he was offended, but at that moment, I saw a red colored laser beam tracking on his desk for all of a 1/10 second. Neither of us mentioned it. He asked about what happened, I told him some specifics that came back to haunt me (suicide attempt), but I did not tell him about the bizarre phenomenon. Although he was plying me for more information, especially detail about what I saw, he indicated that these events were entirely concocted by me over my protests about other externalities -e.g. the putative police evidence raid etc.. He discussed the availability of the employee assistance program when one is unwell. I replied that I didn't need it because there is a significant body of externalities of that needed explanation first, and until then, it wasn't necessary. He accused me of being paranoid, which became the mantra of a number of colleagues and friends, and caused me to suspect they were singing off the same song sheet.
No one at work asked where I was Monday April 15, nor did they wish to enjoin me in conversation with the lead in, "I had an interesting day yesterday". My Alternate Girlfriend (Ms. L), who had arrived back from a week away in New York April 14, was also one of my confidants, and in hindsight, was very likely a cooperator. She also emphasized that I was paranoid, and that I needed help, and was attempting to convince me the Standoff event was delusional. Again I got the paranoid accusation followed with a statement of seeing a counselor. She continued on this theme a number of times until our association ceased (below). Neither girlfriend was very nurturative, and the Sometime Girlfriend got in such a stinking huff that she didn't want to talk to me. These contrived rows became delimiting as to whom and where I could later find refuge.
Two days after the Standoff I found my watch and my 3" pocketknife in my shoe. I never, ever, keep these things there, but always on my bedside table. I had lapsed into unconsciousness with my watch on, so the placement of both of these items was more tangible evidence that someone else had been in my apartment and was party to the Standoff event.
I visited my daughter in Victoria on the following weekend and was treated to the geo-locational phenomenon. In the living room of my parent's house, I felt this sensation which I will term "sounding". Its as if one is vibrating from an outside cause, akin to the early phase of an earthquake. I have since come to experience this numerous occasions, and, as I am the only thing vibrating, my interpretation is that there must be some kind of remotely directed energy applied to the cerebellum. (The cerebellum is the back part of the brain responsible for gross motor movements, and tying sensations together that are experienced at the same time). I have also come to find that this is a locating method, which is followed by more injurious directed energy. A momentary pulse of the AC lighting followed the sounding sensation. As I moved about in the room, a band of large pixels appeared across the TV and the sounding followed me again. I repeated this sequence at least 4 times. I also had the sensation I was being followed by unknown persons a few times during my visit, but I couldn't be absolutely sure.
There was an odd incident when I took the helicopter shuttle back to Seattle. Two men followed me in, and when boarding, one of them broke out of the line and secured a seat ahead of every one else. The other later sat beside him, while I was seated in the row behind them. After the directives about seat belts and warnings about turning cell phones off, the helicopter lifted off, and within a minute or so, the line-jumper pulled out a communications radio, engaged in some kind of transmission, and then hid the device in his coat. He also had a terribly vague reason for visiting the US, but didn't get the usual third degree from the INS officer. This character shows up again.
It was during the period of April 15th to the 24th that I noticed short duration light pulses at night in my apartment. Some were linear, some covered a larger area with red and green as the most common colors. They were constant and unrelenting. I took these to be lasers, and have come to know this as a very common phenomenon, and they occur every night now. My take on these is that they are used for gathering coordinates of where I am in relation to everything else.
Cooked at Work
I knew something was up when one of my co-workers was agitated in my presence, but all too often, I was new in this game. I took my normal dosing of medications at 11:30 am and went home for lunch.
I was about 2:00 pm when I felt this wave of ill feeling and palpitating heart. I stayed rooted at my desk, as I feared getting up. Coincidentally BT came by when the sensation was at its height. I spoke with him briefly and managed to hold a minimal but coherent discussion. The wave subsided only to be replaced by another about an hour later. Again someone tried to engage me in conversation at its peak. Thinking it was a medication tampering, I eventually I got up and went to the nearby drugstore to get some Vitamin C and chocolate (stimulant action blockers). I felt immediately better once I braved getting on my feet. At about 5:00 I emailed the facilities manager about my medications being spiked, and even spoke with my manager about it. When I sent my e-mail, my manager yelled out loudly to the next enclosed office, "We got him". Maybe it was just a coincidence, but it struck me as damned odd, both then and now. On the way home I noticed on person following me, and though I passed him going up the hill, this same person showed up again, later on my walk home. At least four people clustered around me when I went to the drug store to enquire about the possibility of my medications being spiked. The next day I noted the Event Log of my PC had all of April 23 (not the 24th) removed, and as I was perusing this, a manager across the hall exclaimed "uh oh".
The HR department never did look into probable causes, and assigned the blame to me, indicated that I said some strange things. (That my medications were spiked, but then again, if one is feeling strangely, one will likely say odd things). As HR departments are charged with resolving harassment at work, they fared poorly!
I would have settled for just that, but as I sat in my apartment later in the evening, another wave came over me. Now I knew the workplace events were connected to the home events. These strong emanations persisted all over the apartment, and so I decided to take a hotel for the night. I did an elementary spy trick and took the elevator to floor other than my room. I lingered some, and was about to depart when a man exited the elevator, holding a communications radio similar to the one I witnessed on the helicopter shuttle of a week previous. I took the elevator to yet another floor, and then the stairs. I was not immune to being found, as laser lights shone through the peephole and windows. The sounding routine seemed be locating me too. No other phenomenon was evident and I had my best sleep in 5 months. It was my last good night's sleep for more than a year.
4) Human Resources is Here to Help You
Late on the 25th I was summoned into a meeting with the Human Resources manager. "We are worried about you…. you are a valued employee…. etc. But you must see a doctor and get a signed letter of suitability for employment before returning to work. In meantime, short term disability is available…" . I was too exhausted from my many sleepless nights to put up much of a fight about the strange goings-on in the work place that had transpired. The HR manager, never effusive, looked rather conflicted. I did the hospital emergency routine, 5-hour wait for 5 minutes of doctor time, one and a half years to sort out the billing and coverage. After one night of being physically trashed by these irradiations, including being targetted by street shooting (irradiative blasts), that when I visited my family doctor, she explained these events as being a facet of psychosis. No amount of tangible detail seemed to dissuade her. I now realize that the leave from work provided the opportunity to trash me 24x7 so that my employer's worksite would not be impugned. Trash me they did: not only were there debilitating irradiative hits (on the street), there was induced anxiety and driving head pain.
It was following this that my apartment became unlivable. There was some kind of directed energy being applied, and no matter where I moved, it followed. I was pacing around the room to escape the "brain cooking", and although moving about helped at for a time, it didn't anymore. There were sounds in the wall of a switch being thrown, akin to a circuit breaker. Objects flew out of my hands on occasion, and the lights dimmed on their own accord. At any time when I was crafting a countermeasure, the properties of tape, aluminum foil or other common objects changed, and thereby thwarting my endeavors. There was a significant humming sound emanating from the wall, and a mock ventilation fan sound from upstairs each time I turned mine on. There was a sewing machine like sound when my refrigerator compressor was running which was accompanied by an unbearable kind of painful irradiation to the head. Switching off my refrigerator at the circuit breaker caused a cessation of the sewing-machine sound and irradiation, though it resumed but quieter. This was a clue that my electrical power had been tapped into.
A discussion with the Ms L about a request to stay at her place was turned down flat, even though I had considerable credits in aiding her many times when in distress. She played the party line, "You’re psychotic, I can’t help you, don’t call until you get better". That was the last I ever spoke with her, as her purpose in being in my life was abundantly clear. I spent a night at 24 Hr Fitness, but it did get kind of dull around 3:00 - 4:00 and no sleep.
The next week proceeded much like above though intensified; it was the worst of my life. I had another hotel night, but this time they were irradiating me with microwave-like energy all night. I was like a caged rat without the cage; sharp pangs of being "zapped", or irradiated occurred anywhere in public, including the doctor's office. I was always pacing around, trying to find relief from something unknown in kind and source. There seemed to be a significant amount of coincident activity in the upstairs apartment in response to what I did; sometimes there was foot-stomping if I had a successful countermeasure such as lowering the cable light system to create a 4' arc. On occasion there was laughter from upstairs at my countermeasures, and I came to believe, and still do, that this was the operations room and the parabolic dish mentioned earlier may be for data transmission. In reality, a countermeasure didn't last very long before another adaptation foiled it. A second night in a hotel was no relief, the irradiation and brain microwaving persisted and I eventually slept in the hotel main bathroom that was encased in concrete. Another 24 Hr Fitness night was no refuge; I was being irradiated even while swimming. I would visit Kinko's to use their Internet stations to try a find out what was going on, and the perpetrators had a method of dithering my keystrokes, and also causing my Google searches to return something minimally relevant. Occasionally I could slip them by jumping to another search engine, and on each occasion someone would come to the station beside me and look over. They even dithered the shared printing, and I wasn't the only one who lost printouts.
There was no relief while walking the streets; vehicles, cyclists and pedestrians would pass by and cause me to be zapped and causing me severe duress. On a few occasions a person a block away pointed a red laser aiming beam at me and zapped me into a state of momentary pain and dysfunction. I could dodge a source if I could figure out which direction it came from, but soon they put two harassors on so I was in their crossfire. Standing near steel telephone posts was one of my few shelters. Vehicle trips were just as harrowing; they would pass me slowly, and time without fail, zap me. At one time, there were six vehicles clustered around me when I went to make a call from a public phone. On two occasions I found my apartment door open when I had made a short sortie to the garbage chute. On another like occasion when I doubled back to my apartment to collect something, I saw my venetian blinds actively parting about 6 ", controlled by some remote force. That was difficult to believe, but at the same time it added credence to the strange events I witnessed during the Standoff of April 15. Another instance of an entry to my fitness locker was almost as odd. One of the contents of my locker was returned outside my apartment door some two hours later.
I made another trip to Victoria and conferred with my friends, whom I can normally rely upon to be objective, and to my annoyance, they thought this was a "head-problem". I was exasperated; there was no time to read, sit and relax and do any thought work. I was a refugee of unknown and unexplainable directed and persecuting forces. It was my same friends who appeared to help me though. (I say appeared, as later circumstances indicated their complicity) They phoned one night the next week, and I explained the current wild set of circumstances; microwave-like radiation directed at the head, obtaining relief from the shelter of metal objects, an uninvited entry in my apartment where my cable lamp system was modified, and other hard to believe details. They asked me to come over to Victoria the next day, and I agreed. It took another day for me to get my act together and get a flight, but in the meantime the level of radiation was punishing. At the airport I found a steel column to be a refuge from the drive-by radiation, and when I returned to that same location to catch the bus, there were three individuals standing around with portable irradiative devices. It was withering. I took a hotel room that night, and there were lasers passing through the peephole, and they even burned holes in the rubberized curtain. Before I got to my room, one of two individuals kept following me about the hotel floors, in Keystone Cops like encounter. It was another hellish morning replete with two individuals maintaining eye contact in the waiting area that kept moving around for a direct line of sight on me. I finally caught some sleep in the aircraft, but again the irradiative sources started coming on again as I approached Victoria. I suspect that there must be some kind of remote control on the delivery of radiation, and the individuals, whether on foot, driving, loitering or whatever, are carriers of the device and they receive instructions on where and how to conduct themselves and place it.
5) You Are Safe in the Loony Bin
I told my friends the story again, and to alleviate their concerns they invited the Help/Crisis line folks to hear me out. Before I knew it, I was in the hospital as a voluntary patient. I agreed mainly for the reason to seek refuge from the intense harassment, and for a week, as long as I was inside and not out on a pass, it was. I was to be off all my ADD medications and take mood stabilizers. Two doctors later it was the same diagnosis: psychosis due to amphetamine neurotoxicity. That they weren't interested in any of the other details or my theories was becoming the usual treatment. I now realize that my "friends" were quislings (turncoats), and the entire period from, say Nov. 2001 to April/May of 2002 was a lead up to making me as trashed as they could in order to make the parrotted and wrong diagnosis of "psychosis" stick. The plan of the past six months was clear: irradiate me to create dysfunction, cause my stimulant dose to increase, then continue this cycle and then top it off with a barrage of unheard of techological weapons, and of course, augmented with remotely induced anxiety.
For a few days I felt that I was recovering; I needed the sleep and the sudden medication adjustment was tiring. Before long I noticed the laser pulses at night, and I began to think that the perpetrators were coming back. And it was true.
Patients that were friendly to me wouldn't talk to me anymore, others I hardly knew were moving away from me for no reason, others exchanged looks with others, and the man I saw on the helicopter shuttle with the communications radio also showed up as a patient. I had an EEG test and was exposed to some very bright lights. Thereafter, for two weeks or more, there were a significant number of vehicles that had their bright lights on, even in daytime, anytime I was out driving on day pass. At one point I went to Home Depot and purchased a metal-backed weather seal for my parent's door. Curiously, it took on properties of its own, as it moved by itself as if a large receiving aerial. The small tools hanging from the racks moved on their own accord when I wandered near them and a significant number of pretend shoppers hung around me.
As all too usual, there were people hanging around me, at odds far greater than any normal shopping coincidence. There was always someone who moved in quickly when I made my purchase. I was being irradiated anytime I was outside on day pass, and the success rate of being irradiated while inside the hospital was becoming greater. It seemed that one of the patient's motorized Medichair was the source of the irradiations as it had a 12v automotive-type battery onboard. No doubt the building was difficult to penetrate with magnetic or electric radiation as it was a steel-concrete construction, and I saw various markings appear on the walls, in the bathroom, a steel bead on my bedside bookshelf, and yellow-amber crystalline dried insect look-alikes on the walls. One of these had showed up in my apartment earlier. The surveillance was very frequent anytime I was out on day-pass, and the frequency of irradiation, at a bend-over double intensity level. After 3 weeks I checked out of the hospital for insurance coverage reasons, when they informed me I was only 70% covered when earlier they indicated that I was 100% covered. The hospital did not return my mother’s phone calls on this very same subject until the same day they informed me. Too much of a coincidence. Other induced dysfunction that occurred when I checked into hospital were no pens in my briefcase and a smashed Palm Pilot.
The next month, late May to late June proceeded much like before; being irradiated, sometimes punishingly so, especially when I went to a library or public internet site. I was continually harassed, if it’s the correct term, by "close-passers-by" or "cluster fuckers" as I later called them. These would be pedestrians who for some reason hang around me, pass closely or pretend to change their mind about their direction. Any given occurrence is not unusual, but cummulatively, say 10 or more incidents per day, was most odd. On other occasions I saw red lasers pointed at my room from a distance. My concentration was poor; I couldn't read a newspaper for 5 minutes, when an hour was the previous norm. All the time I had to keep up a pretense that nothing was happening, as all the psychosis believers, like my mother (later found to be a quisling), would find food for their narrow opinion. My mother had nothing to offer about why proximity to steel objects helped alleviate the symptoms, or connect the frequent break-ins of my vehicle to any of the above. A visitation to my brother in Kamloops did not relieve the irradiation feeling, and all too unfortunately, he did not believe I was being harassed and irradiated by anyone or organization. As it later turned out, he was working for the other side too. It's been a lonely and uphill row to hoe, and I had no part in choosing it.
Stealth Phase; June 19 to Oct. 2002
It was June 19 when I bought a Trifield meter that measured electric, magnetic and radio radiation. It was quite apparent that the magnetic radiation scale was the most active, and at first it was wildly successful in picking up high, 2-3 milliGauss level radiation that would suddenly appear when certain individuals were passing by. My apartment had greater than 10 mG; I could feel the huge nauseous wave of magnetic radiation emanating from the bathroom, just as before. Then within a day, this highly assaultive and withering radiation stopped. I challenge any of the naysayers, clinical or otherwise, to name a medication, legal or illegal, that would have this kind of immediate and positive change. In hindsight this was a ruse used to cause me to believe the meter readings, and this also was a change in strategy from the frontal attack to a much longer term stealth harassment. I have since come to distrust all my meter readings as they are much too low (see below).
For a month or so I thought I was on easy street, but as I got my life back together I became less certain. For one, a certain individual who I saw earlier at the hospital in advance of being exposed to a laser show of micro-wigglers, re-appeared outside the nearby hotel where the parabolic dish is located. Once I got my PC up and running, and found websites that provide similar accounts to mine, indicating that the harassment never ends, I became concerned. There was a low level magnetic radiation of 0.4 mG, though the fluctuating needle caused me some concern because that signified activity.
It was the accumulation of a number of clues over August that I concluded that I was being irradiated with some kind of pulsed energy beam. At times the wall clicking would start and I would feel some kind of pulse to my face and the meter reading would move upward 0.6 milliGauss to 0.8 milliGauss. A glass of nearby water was never still, as the surface was constantly rippling. As if this were bad enough, the same low energy pulsed beam was directed at my head at work all day long since my return in late July. Apart from the meter reading and needle fluctuation, I had rapid onsets of sinus pressure, yawning, and ear pressure as well as sensations of hair raising, something trailing through my eyelashes, and my eyes drying out rapidly. My ability to concentrate was poor. I was very groggy in the mornings, and this, with some kind of exploratory muscle twitching and internal organ vibration at night, caused me to believe that I was being irradiated at night. Invariably when I go to new locations, a bright green or red laser dot shows up in my field of vision, some 8-10' away, and some kind of harassment begins: a sudden yawning onset or magnetic irradiation typically. The technology seems such that a laser spot can "appear from" any household AC wiring. Related to this, anytime I have moved about in the unusual location or when I am in my bathroom, the lights momentarily pulse off/on. I sense that the perpetrators can use the AC wiring and light pulses of some kind to take a snapshot. When I read what "through-the-wall" radar technologies can do nowadays, it would be no surprise to me that the AC wiring can be exploited for surveillance purposes. Another new harassment method is to direct sounds to my head just as I am falling into a deeper sleep. This causes me to stay awake for the night usually.
Other studied phenomenon that are likely being applied are some kind of direct retina irradiation, where they "see" the images on the retina directly, just as one does. There were countless times when I would stop and gaze at something, a double take as it were, and just then a momentary pulse of the A/C lighting would occur to obtain a "snapshot" from another perspective. I cannot make my eyes dark if I close my eyelids and place my hands over them. If I place my arms over my head or temples I will notice a further darkening of my eyes, though its rare that it is completely dark. The methods they have of locating my eyes and retina seem myriad. I now understand that lasers can be directed to penetrate the skull and cause differing tissue to resonate uniquely. I also notice a pulsing flash across my retina (when my eyes are closed) at about the same rate as the gaussmeter fluctuation, which could mean the source is magnetic. Likely it is both, though in new and public locations I suspect this method is not so reliable, and they resort to A/C power flashes and the small microdot lasers that project toward my eyes and read the image from there. To me, this is the ultimate in invasion of privacy, to be able to see what another person sees in real time, all the time. It’s not quite full blown mind-reading, but should one take a prolonged look at something, they have a pretty good idea what you are thinking about too.
Magnetic Machinations Update (12-2002)
The current standards for continuous exposure to magnetic radiation used by most of the world are those from Sweden and are:
5 Hz - 2kHz up to 2.5 milliGauss
2 kHz - 400 kHz up to 0.25 milliGauss
So here I am, typically exposed to 200 Gauss in my apartment, and wondering who is it that passed a death sentence on me, and what right do they have? Despite my early and apparent success with measuring the magnetic field, I began to suspect the meter was incorrectly displaying the results when I acquired another meter. Eventually I rented a large industrial gaussmeter for a month (11-2002) and found my two hand meters to be both suspect. It recorded 100 - 200 gauss (not milligausss) and as it had an external probe, I found the reading to be higher at first, and then it trended downward within 20 seconds or so. If I coiled up the probe lead wire, the higher readings remained for longer.
New apartment, Oct. 2002
I moved apartments hoping that a concrete/steel structure would offer protection, and it didn't take more than 3 weeks for them to set up upstairs and to hear the same clunking and clicking sounds associated with the head pain all over again. There seems to be an inherent magnetism, even if weak, in nearly all things in my apartment. If I hold a hand compass at arm's length, it changes direction when I bring it close to my body. Two identical hand compasses will point to different directions if more than 12" apart. For those familiar with this harassment it should be no surprise that there were a number of moving glitches; disconnected accounts, internet service interuptions, mail re-direction problems,- the list is endless.
And there were daily break-ins; not only was there smudged walls, plaster crumbs and PC hacking, my modem was physically broken to thwart web access. I even hired a private detective who at least verified the occurence of the upstairs switch/clunk sounds, and also the intense energy that was applied to me. When we first met at a coffee shop, the nearby floor boards were also vibrating. Later we went for a walk which relieved the intensity of the irradiation, and when I sat in his van, it vibrated from the same reason. Even though late in the game, I had confirmation that someone else could experience (some of) the same phenomenon, which again, is contrary to the past diagnosis of "psychosis". I even went upstairs one time to voice my complaint about their harassment activity, and was met with an overwhelming irradiative assault through the door.
More Driving Headpain: Nov., Dec. 2002
During November and December there were more events that were intended to drive me back to hospital in Victoria. The highway convoys began firing lasers at my face and into my eyes. I called the Everett police on one occasion, but they didn't seem too interested in chasing this down.
The criminal harassors stepped up the level of magnetic irradiation, at my apartment and then my work site. The headpain was intense. It was avoidable and blockable especially about steel and other metal objects. Also as indicated, it was measurable all the time, which defeats the "faux psychosis" diagnosis I had been stiffed with in May 2002. My only reprieve was to go driving at night time, as I recieved recieved less irradiation (seemingly) or at least less pain. This created a whole new panalopy of events. On the interstate I-5 there were typically 30-100 vehicles that would group well back of me, and another group formed well ahead. In ordered progression one or two vehicles would depart from the rearmost group, and pass by slowly, and then join the group up ahead. This "convoying" would happen every night I drove and while seeming innocuous at first, I later came to know that this was to organize the laser attacks while driving. At first I got some sleep in my car at the rest areas, but they then stationed vehicle around me, or even had prestationed vehicles. In either case the headpain resumed and I couldn't sleep. The interesting thing was that I didn't seem to miss the sleep, and nor was I hungry from missed meals. I even tried sleeping in my car in the covered parkade of the apartment, but within a few days I noticed a series of regularly spaced holes in the concrete at 2', 5' and 6' spaced every 2'. From these shot lasers that we used to range find and identify me. I estimated that there were some 500 holes that they drilled in the parking area concrete and then painted to appear as part of the forms when originally poured. It astounds me how much effort was, and still is, expended to harass the living daylights out of me.
Betrayed by family quislings (12-2002)
On one of my directed headpain evasive nighttime driving trips I went to see my brother and sister-in-law in Kamloops BC. Even though I did not mention my intent until I had driven for two hours, there was a bizzare set-up which again amazes me as to the extent of this harassment. I took a side road to change my choice of highway and it was set up with false road sign posting, wetted with water and with white sand thrown down to simulate snow at night. With some prior local knowledge, I followed my instincts and got myself on the Coquihalla highway onto Kamloops.
The first night at my brother's I got a reasonable sleep, but the second night I heard familiar switch/clunks sound heard in both my apartments, I saw lasers constantly and could not sleep for the driving head pain, no matter where I tried. He and his wife seemed rather doleful when they surfaced for breakfast, and when I confronted him he seemed rather weak explaining the details as to what I experienced. All told it was way too unconvincing, and he kept falling back to his (trained, I assume) storyline. It was terribly sad that somehow he was in on this, and I made the shortcomings of his explanations more than plain. It was clear that he and his wife knew all about my harassment rationale. Anyway, I had a 5 hour chat to myself enroute to Seattle, reworking the story and the players. I spent the journey putting the bigger, newer story together and realizing that my mother was also equally complicit by way of the same rigid answers without so much as a footstep of analytical progression along the same evidence trail. This betrayal picture became more complete when others postulated the same line of "its medication-not-irradiation" hooey. I am positive that the criminal harassors planned for me to find out, one by one, that my support group were quislings from the beginning. To me, nobody is more despicable than a turncoat, or quisling. I even have more respect for the equally insidious infiltrators, Ms. C and Ms. L.
Merry Christmas 2002
For Christmas the bastards hit me with some exceptionally heavy laser hits to the back of the head that took about 4 hours of pain to dissipate. By the time I recovered from this, twice, the driving headpains were no more, but there was plenty of evidence of being irradiated all the same. I speculate that they took out some cerebal pain sources, and my sensitivity to being irradiated was much lessened. I spent Christmas sleeping in my vehicle, as I was being heavily irradiated at Ms. C's and could not settle there despite her protestations. I found it no coincidence that my psychiatrist got plenty of mileage out of this event to suggest a psychosis diagnosis. Though to be fair, she did say that in her professional experience that she had never seen anybody in such pain.
A significant component of harassment is the orchestration of perceived near death experiences (PNDE's) from April 15 2002 to date (07-2003). The Razzle Dazzle show was the most blatant threat, and others have been as simple as a pretend gunshot that just missed me. Naturally they also invoke my fear and anxiety brain centers to heighten the perception and mental disruption. They have on occasion polluted my water and food with substances that caused all day urination, and on another occasion, tingling sensation in my extremities, as if it were the onset of poisoning . By my count there have been eight such incidents when I thought my end was nigh.
There were also three laser "duck-shoot" events in December that were designed to herd me, while driving, to a prefered direction. These all took place while I was driving, and it was the malevolent side of the convoy organizing I experienced earlier. I experienced laser hits to my face and hands while driving on the highway; a vehicle would drive up beside me, and an onboard laser device would attempt to hit me in the head, particularly the face and eyes. To say that driving in this situation was harrowing does not give this experience justice. That it went on for an hour or two hours at a time was all the more adverse.
There were two police-like "takedown" events in December 2002 which caused me to make some phonecalls that I thought were my last words. Subsequently, on my return to Victoria the genuine police came on me with pointed guns and handcuffed and drove me to the hospital in the paddy wagon. On the first occasion I managed to appear sufficiently collected, despite being heavily irradiated, such that the doctor couldn't find a compelling reason to commit me. On the second occasion I was driven with so much magnetic radiation that they removed the couch (with steel springs) out of the (same) interview room in advance of my arrival. Even the apprehending police officers could not bear to be in the room for the intensity of the magnetic energy. The second time I was commited on the recommendation of one doctor when the legal requirement is two with an assist of a pack of lies from my ex-wife who was given free reign to say what she wanted without being corroborated by me. And so began my 5 month hospital stay, all for a condition I didn't have (psychosis), to remove me from the medications for a condition I do have (ADD). I surmise that the hell in the past year was in some measure due to taking a medication that the criminal harassors didn't like because it interfered with their plan (see Summary (07-2003): Musings on the Experimental Objective.
My attempt to be released by a review panel did not go very well, as the harassors irradiated me all the more during the hearing causing me to be dithered, unfocussed and generally messed up. However, there was a significant slip-up of factual information: my treating psychiatrist did revealed the names of two doctors I saw in Oct.-Nov. 1999 whose names I did not reveal to anyone. (They were useless; they did not ask appropriate clinical questions and yet diagnosed no ADD). I confronted my treating psychiatrist with this anomaly and he really did not have answer as to how he found out their names. As I interpret this event, he is yet another doctor on the take, and inadvertently placed the early origins of the criminal harassment.
After 5 months of hospital treatment with a medication that made me worse, for the reasons that it was a dopamine antagonist, they discharged me from hospital. That this was the third occurence of this class of medication which caused depression and dysfunction did not seem to perturb the clinical staff, even if I predicted it in advance. I came to understand there is a tight police-clinical community linkage that serves to involuntarily dispatch individuals, often with the "psychosis" label, should it be deemed needed by the authorities. All it takes is one police officer's written testimony of refutal of evidence and a sympathetic doctor followed by another toady doctor's signature and you are involuntarily committed for a month. Extensions up to a year require only a single doctor in the province of BC. Psychiatry is the last refuge of a scoundrel in my experience.
Laser Lashings (07-2003)
While this method is not new to me since 04-15-2002, the Razzle Dazzle show, it had been building up since 05-2003. Lasers, or something like them, strike me in the face, eyes, feet, right thigh and sometimes other body locations. They are annoying and sometimes painful to be sure, especially when they go on all day, and then at night they turn them on to give me full body jerks just as I am going off to sleep. One day and night was particularly bad, as it took some 4 hours to get to sleep. I was steamed enough to bring it forward to my parents and told my mother who cast me into this (my determination), "to go and speak to your handler and summon the gumption and end this nightmare". Natually she got all defensive and attempted to tie these sensations to the faux psychosis. There was some more back and forthing on these respective views, but there was an interesting comment she made afterward to my father, when she thought I was out of earshot; she said, "I think we shall press on". There was no other context but that of this wretched harassment and her defensiveness. In this one phrase, not intended for my ears, all the loose ends and accumulation of detail was sintered into a cohesive whole. My parents went "shopping" (i.e. visit the handler) shortly afterwards, and to no suprise to me, the frequency and strength of the laser hits diminished sharply to make them tolerable thereafter. It was no surprise to me that since this incident they dispersed from the breakfast table anytime I came downstairs.
Current State Wrap Up (09-2003)
As one can surmise, I do not know for certain what the harassment objective is. It would seem that it is to discover all the parameters to be able to model weak biomagnetic fields, both as they occur intrinsically and in confluence with other sources such as people. Another objective that seems clear to me is to refine the application of real time magnetic energy to a live target to ensure 24x7 irradiation. Even 8 minutes in a tanning both was unacceptable; they rigged them up with their laser/maser harassment set up at the public fitness center. For this they need to be able to constantly calibrate their reading devices which were the all to familiar switch/clunk sounds emanating from the apartments above mine, at my family quisling residences, and latterly at work. Even my vehicle makes an unusual (never before) rattling sound in the dashboard in concert with other noisy events like suspension clunks or other vehicle events such as turning corners, (to emulate a scuffing sound in the steering column, suspension travel and others). Again, I conject that a partial objective is to automate the directed calibration and application of laser/masers to a person while attempting to dynamically use environmental noises as a cover.
I have a sense that the natural magnetic cells in the brain (that is how pigeons navigate so well) have been enhanced by driving me with microwaves (with insufferable pain) for eight months of 2002. And that the current irradiation is meant to keep that level to a certain minimum. In effect, I am a walking biomagnetic radiator (though a highly variable one), and there is something of value or assay purposes that I possess to cause the litany of "followers" everywhere I go. I feel like Harry Pottter in some respects, that I have some kind of supernatural capabilities, that is cause for the dark forces to inflict pain and pursue me. I even wish I had a scar as a badge of honor, but I'm sure this will end (if it does) with no closure or explanation whatsoever.
It would appear, based on the actions of my parents in masking the nighttime entry of a person who reads me through the wall, that the clinical terrorists cannot go for more than an hour without re-irradiating me to keep the magnetic field at a high level. (It would dissapate over time). Or, if the criminals irradiate me too much, say at swim practice where they find it difficult to dynamically assay me, and as a consequence I cannot get to sleep, again my parents partake in masking the entry of a "Sandman" to reduce my biomagnetic levels so I can then sleep. Though I have since seen one of my followers mimicking my swimming and diving at a nearby lake and I can only surmise that they are attempting to model my biomagnetic properties even while swimming.
And in my fourth living location since 2002 (two in Seattle, hospital and basement suite in Victoria), the upstair noises have similarities in all locations. The same movements of personnel upstairs, the switching sounds to refine the calibration of magnetic irradiation, and the need for wires in the walls to control and apply it. In each apartment, the refrigerator grunts along like it was seriously overloaded when the compressor is running. The same amount of setup activity is incurred at each location, it takes them about a month to set up because it largely depends on where my furniture is located, where my AC wiring is located and what locations I frequent the most.
Summary: Musings on the Experimental Objective (07-2003)
It appears to me that a number of simultaneous methods are employed with some kind of dynamic decision making software that applies rules of final determination and instructs magnetic radiation emitting device(s) accordingly. I have on occasion experienced situations where I was detected in a room, but the laser/maser torture application was foiled (inadvertently) and the detection device then emitted a high pitched warning sound, the same in all cases and places. I suspect a considerable part of this experiment (harassment) is the integration of a number of technologies, some of which are not very familiar. There would be a number of radars to see through the wall, detail my profile, others to pick out my identifying features such as dental work, the orientation of my head in real-time, possibly picking up the dental implants, as well as the lasers (known to me by facial strikes) and masers, magnetic energy pulses. Also important are the location of all metal objects as these seem to be a ready source of magnetic radiation. (I have seen many pulses coming from metal surfaces).
Its my supposition that these harassors are attempting to develop a model of human biomagnetics which will account for all sources of change, environment and food intake. This would explain why all major grocers I frequent dispatch a copy of my grocery bill to some destination, why they cluster around me and purchase the same items I do at farmers markets, why the lights momentarily blink each time I visit the bathroom, why some food products dissapear of the grocery store shelves after I purchase them and the reason for being shanghaied into hospital to endure 5 months of simple and bland food. The reason for being contained in a constant high magnetic field is to enhance the ability of the remote monitoring equipment. There must be some kind of neurological effect that they are wishing to accomplish also which accounts for why they stiffed me with a condition (the faux psychosis diagnosis) for which my stimulants for ADD are contra-indicated. The stimulatnt medications are neurologically restorative and this somehow interferes with the clinical terrorist's intended brain ablation-regrowth cycle.
My notion of being a biomagnetic modelling subjects is speculative, but after spending five useless (to me) months in hospital, the only other conclusion that I came to was that if the harassors can turn down the intensity of the magnetic radiation, they can turn it off too. But they haven't; I suspect that while in there they were attempting to model my biomagnetic profile by monitoring what I ate or drank. No end of patients cruised about me when I finished by meal. At least two of the nearby stores were set up to pass my purchase information to the harassors. Patients and even some hospital staff chose to overtly sit or circulate by me for the lamest of reasons. I came to call them and their kind "clusterers", or in profane moments, "cluster fuckers" and they are an ubiquitious item wherever I go. My only relative freedom is when I go running and even at that they attempted to thwart this once by remotely invoking injury, and de-energizing me until their harassment software could sustain irradiative application as I ran. Lately (09-2003) they have been governing down my running speed, no matter how proficient I have become.
Summary: Musings on a Conspiracy (07-2003)
As I have stated in some of the above sections, I believe these events to be the result of a conspiracy by a US government agency undertaking an experiment on a nonconsensual subject (me) in concert with an employer (a US company, JEZ) and nearly all my quisling friends and family. The few friends that don't phone or respond to my calls are likely the only ones that did not agree to enjoin in this travesty. All the rest, including my ex-wife who had much to gain from casting me into a bad light, are privy to the methods, objectives and nature of this highly invasive and total harassment. During this time I can recall at least three nascent relationships that suddenly ended when the persons did not attend the fitness classes where we met and conversed.
In retrospect, I have a notion that this was hatched in fall 1999 begining with the purchased complicity of my parents. After that, everyone else caved in (for monetary inducements) and enjoined in playing up the faux psychosis diagnosis or otherwise attempted to diminish or negate my observations to the contrary. I also suspect that this was a joint Canadian and US project planned well in advance, and the deficiencies of the laws of one country were exploited to maximum effect. It is my understanding that there is a higher burden of proof in the US before one can be legally and involuntarily commited to hospital. Therefore, the impetus was on both planned hospitalizations to drive me back to Canada where I could be commited with a single doctor's signature (in the province of BC at least). They could then continue their electromagnetic pummeling (05-2002) or assaying (01 thru 06-2003) while I was relatively captive in hospital and without my usual resourcefullness in erecting defenses, even if transitory. This may also explain why they wanted a Canadian from the TN visa list.
The clinical community was also full measure in participating, and there were very few who did not aid or have knowledge of this constant nightmare I have been thrust into. Even a clinician in Kent WA who is on public record in stating the existence of nonconsensual testing in the US had his chain jerked in advance of my visit (in my estimation), and I repeatedly had to stop him from delving into the diversionary ADD component of my clinical history. Though to his credit and my detriment, my Victoria GP bailed out on me,citing the ludicrous excuse that my case was "too complicated". There are some, albeit few, doctors that did not want to enjoin in innocent citizen harassment.
I suspect that the offer of employment by JEZ in Seattle was the beginning of remotely induced dysfunction and mood depressing irradiation (likely both laser and magnetic). There were many work related lead ups to the April 15 2002 event of course, but in reflecting on BT's actions, I suspect he was the window into how all their operatives were doing (in my opinion) and the nature of my family associations. When I reflect on it, and I believe that I even confided to someone at the time, I always thought he seemed "conflicted". My move to Seattle from Everett diminished the relationship with Ms. C, but she was artfully substituted with an ADD person, Ms. L.
It is clear to me that both Ms. C and L. were both planted infiltrators to extract more information from me, and to guide and set up events that served both the experimental and harassment objective. In both cases there were unwarranted and unsettling disagreements that blew up and prevented the relationship from deepening. It should be noted that the clinical terrorists gained considerable clinical response information from events described above as Ms. L and I shared our clinical tribulations in great detail. We would each supply the other with the needed "starch" to upbraid our respective, and frustrating, doctors in advance of appointments.
Ms. L (my ADD companion) bailed out on me when the first apartment intrusion happened April 15, 2002. Although Ms. C was front and center in setting me up for the April 15 apartment invasion by sowing fear, uncertainty and doubt (FUD), I continued my on/off relationship with Ms. C until recently (06-2003). It is very likely that the harassment terrorists planted positive images of her such that I resumed the relationship even though I did not fully trust her any more. She also engaged in emotional trashing at times, and was a constant sandbag to my analysis in developing any kind of unified theory on the events I have experienced above (with abridgements). I became extremely tired of her constant promotion of my (faux) psychosis diagnosis and having to re-play every detail of the whole story in order to convince her (again and again) of it's likelihood. This technique of designed "fact lapses" amongst those who ought to have a concern about my wellbeing was played to great effect amongst a number of the quislings (parents, brother etc.). I repeat, they just don't care, if they were willing to enjoin in this treachery which has now run for 4 years (09-2003) and not explain it when I ask.
Summary: Technical Observations/Harassment Techniques (07-2003)
While this is not a complete list, here are my speculations as to the technical elements that are contributing to my ongoing harassment and speculations on the nature of the technology that makes it possible.
Remote Brain Monitoring and Dithering
In reflecting on my state and the ever increasing dysfunction that was partially ameliorated by stimulant medication, it seems to me that the Harassaratzi have the means to remotely induce various states of mental dysfunction. This can vary from inducing a depressive trend to the point of suicidality, an profound absence of estimating and/or awareness of time passing, forgetfulness, agitation, heightened anxiousness, being totally zoned out -there but completely unaware, thought stuck, and even klutzy. They can even induce the sensation of particular smells without any normal cause. From my experience, they are operational masters at this, and can invoke these and other states of mental dysfunction in a targetted individual with relative ease. I was aware of the more egregious aspects at the time of inducement, where others were long term trends and I now know only in hindsight. It is positively alarming that this kind of power over individuals exists and that anyone can be targeted without a clue of its occurrence.
It goes without saying that this was a method from the get go. I always pondered why my PC, identical to that of my boss, BT, often crashed due to memory failure. Most of the persistent hacking was on my home PC, and even now, getting the Event viewer to write to viewable files cannot be done. This also occurred at work on networked PC. They can even hack into a PC even if not on a network through the AC power lines I suspect -I have seen the Event Logs, and from what I can make out, they invoke the Remote Login function, call a particular authentication package, downgrade the encryption and let themselves in and run a package to capture password changes. They appear to be using the WOW, Windows 98 on Windows 2000 (or later) so they have their own operable area and do not share memory addresses with other native operating systems (Windows 2000) . There have been some strange changes that are not by my hand, and no one else uses my computer. They can invoke sudden crashes if one is browsing a web site they don't approve of. They have invoked all manner of barriers to enabling printing; broken printer, stolen driver software, supplying incorrect driver software, and disabling the function of printer driver setup. My "friends" broke the seal on my Linux CD set and to no suprise, it too was hacked.
There is something about many objects in my orbit where the harassors simply must vandalize it such that one side is immediately unique from the other. They gouged my vehicle on one side, removed the reflective patch on my running pants on one side, scratched up my Gargoyle sunglass on one lens, and cracked my watch crystal remotely with a magnetic pulse on one side. Eventually they broke both my watches by remote means because they both had metal mesh watch bands.
The Harassaratzi don't like items rolling around in my vehicle as I travel, nor any kind of exterior movement such as flapping molding rubber. They have directly or remotely moved things in my car in my absence to ensure that there are less objects that have motion near me. They seemed to have a tough time with my silk scarf that had long tassels that blew about in the weather.
Remote Object Manipulation
As described above, these harassment terrorists have means to remotely move objects. I have seen my venetian blinds part unbidden, my door move within it's frame, a rug move along the floor etc. I suspect my missing wallet in 1999 was the result of them moving it out of my pocket while I was seated in the movie. That my coat landed on a burning candle when I didn't place it there (above, Ms. C) was another clever trick. Most times its a gratuitous annoyance, but on one occasion they attempted to cause my steel banded watch to fall into the toilet. (I snatched it just in time). I have seen them remotely move my thumb onto a jagged piece of metal that I was holding, cause a small cut, and then return the thumb to it's original position all within less than a quarter second. Another of their favorite games is monitoring one on a computer, and when a substantial body of work has been done, they remotely manipulate a finger keystroke blunder and poof, all the work is lost. Another is to cause both hands to separate from the steering wheel while driving, and momentarily one cannot move them back, causing yet another PDNE. They have a decided dislike of me chewing gum (the jaw movement causes extraneous biomagnetic fields that their sensors have difficulty separating from the others) and have on a number of occasions caused me to bite my tongue or cheek. That it occurs exactly in the same locations in my mouth indicates that this is remotely induced, on top of the fact that I have never, ever bit any location in my mouth for over 40 years.
Electronic Object Intrusion
It seems to me that the harassment terrorists have the means to "hack" into most kinds of electronic objects. My Sony Discman's properties were modified remotely as the volume was slowly reduced, (and thereby limiting the magnetic field of the headphones on my head). Then they decided to kill the volume control altogether and I can only listen at the set volume of the Line Out jack. I even bought an electronic pest deterrent device for fun one time, and they hacked into it and disabled it in 20 minutes.
Any current-carrying wires, such as for headphones, can be "electromagnetically-tamed" and governed such that they don't perturb any other electromagnetic fields from other nearby sources. Time after time, I have seen the external probe gaussmeter lead wire incur a widely different reading when uncoiled than coiled. The latter case has a higher reading owing to the greater difficulty of remotely controlling the electromagnetic energy in the lead wire.
Sudden Guest Appearances
I don't know for sure how it's done, but there has been someone up in the attic space in my parent's place when I have been staying there. The attic entrance is in their room even, but I am positive no one slipped in and wiggled through the tight space. I heard thumping going on from the attic space one morning, and my mother, in her bedroom exclaimed to my father, "he's awake" (meaning me), and then Attic Man shortly stopped making any noise. This also confirms that somehow, my parents have a real-time video feed on what I'm doing and where I am in their house.
No Privacy for Four+ years
How else can they protect the complicit when I am amongst them except by constant monitoring of my finances, possessions, activity and any other life event. Upon reaching this awful conclusion you can imagine that a private person like I has found this to be devastating and utterly enraging.
Object Quantization and Directed Irradiation
It appears to me that the criminals can remotely evaluate an object and cause it to radiate magnetic energy. I have seen gray or white colored pulses coming off tin cans, paired wires in my car, radiating vehicle panels, and even from non metallic objects at times. In my estimation they criminals are capturing the "scalar" electromagnetic energies and can utilize nearly anything to project a series of energy pulses toward an identified target (me, likely assisted by dental implants). See Tom Bearden's site www.cheniere.org for some explanations including constructs such as altering the space-time continuum. I don't profess to understand much of what he says, but there are a number of other researchers outside the Soviet Union who are troving through the field of "energetics" and can explain much more than what I have been exposed to. The harassors especially like objects with magnets in them, e.g. audio speakers, TV, CRT etc.
Its been my experience that cathode ray tubes (CRT) and televisions can be co-opted for the purpose of irradiating someone in the path of its screen or even for surveillance. More than once I have been rendered to be feeling extremely ill and tired, only to resolve the problem by getting up and away from the device.
Surveillance is Complete
I am positive the criminals can access much of what I hear and see remotely by way of neural monitoring. Occasionally, if I select a new location with significant background electromagnetic energy, such as under a fluorescent light, they will direct a "standing wave laser", probably a plasma field, which will be near the item I am attending to, and I assume that they can read the retina of my eyes to see what I see.
Its my experience that the criminals can hack into the AC wiring system and see into a building through TV's, cathode ray tubes or any lighted control panel. A co-worker at JEZ did not give me a free television for altruistic reasons, it was a surveillance object. Most often it is common household objects that are co-opted for surveillance. A shiny stainless steel kettle, given to me by Ms. L is a perfect object to reflect the magnetic pulse fields for surviellance, as are loud speakers, or any other convex or concave reflective shape.
Occasionally, once one has moved in, they will drill the walls with some kind of very thin optical fibre that creates a weevil-like microholes in the plaster. The fibre will sometimes project from the hole but it will be very quickly retracted should I happen to see it.
Every night-time, though I'm sure it occurs around me in the day-time, my bedroom is filled with laser pulses chattering back and forth (red and green), point sources of light (white and bluish) and often with partial room illuminating microflashes. On occasion, when the laser/maser power level is improperly set, a pulse will cause immediate pain, and from that, they turn down the power level to tolerable amounts. The shear complexity of running all these light sources and their communication astounds me, and at time scares me as to the immensity of the endeavor in which I find myself as the nonconsensual centerpiece. Invarialbly they take 3 to 4 weeks to fine tune their suveillance and harassment activities in the three places I have lived when I knew they were onto me. One reason is that they need to find out what places I frequent the most, and then fine tune their irradiative and surveillance devices.
Pollution of all Friends and Family
As indicated above, my wretched parents are party to this travesty and are the lead players in capitulating and creating a cascade of quislings among my trusted friends. Since that betrayal of four years ago, other friends who I have recently re-aquainted with on my return to Victoria have also been "intercepted" and apprised of my personal nightmare, and consequently treat me like a leper.
One of the most exasperating aspects of this personal hell is the appearance of "cluster fuckers" or followers everywhere in public I go. The number of people in public who accidentally-on-purpose turn into me, get in my path, collide or otherwise loiter around me is outrageous and constant. Sometimes they are in place before I get to frequented locations, but are almost always detectable for reasons that I won't divulge here. Vehicle travel is similarly fraught with followers who just have to have their headlights in one of my rear view mirrors and will move their vehicle in direct response should I adopt a new driving posture that eliminates their headlight reflection from my sight. There are also an incredible number of on-coming vehicles with bright headlights, more than normal. My theory is that they are attempting to lock my eyes in on a low level laser network, an infrastructure unknown to me before this blanket of wretchedness descended.
I cannot prove it, but its been my experience in dealing with a number of the family quislings that they seem to be able to develop answers or form questions that is normally outside their level of expertise or understanding, and yet they keep going breezily from topic to topic. For the longest time I thought it was by way of some kind of common cleverness that infected everyone but me. Upon careful observation it occured to me that they must be receiving a visual text message to support them in their statements, as they have more access to facts than they do ordinarily and they artfully skip over topics where they are not doing too well.
Summary: Health (07-2003)
As I indicated above, I believe that I am constantly encapsulated in a magnetic field of some 200+ Gauss. Since 10-2002 I have incurred many more zits on my face and my hair and nail growth has increased by a third. Some skin infections have occured, and are very difficult to heal.
In terms of mental function I feel as good as I did 10 years ago, and slowly it has dawned on me that the dysfunction of exacerbated Attention Deficit Disorder of the past four years has been remotely induced. Not only is this kind of remote dithering apalling, it is the means to control people and slowly render them down as if it was an organic condition to the point of inducing their suicide.
Summary: Conclusion (09-2003)
Now that the intense laser/maser strikes have been lessened (Laser Lashing, above), apparently in response to me demanding that my mother "end this nightmare now", the degree of harassment is relatively low. There are insistent crawling sensations in or around my eyes, testicles and head as well as a mild stinging laser/maser to my eyes, feet or right thigh. One thing that makes me concerned is that sexual function has not returned with better mental function. Other than that, my life is a whole lot better than the constant driving head pain of last year. But still, I am a nonconsensual test subject and whatever they have in mind is something that no one would ordinarily agree to in advance. The size of this project, the degree of resources and their coordination, the 24x7 irradiation and the thousands (by now) of cluster fuckers, followers and their ilk just astounds me as to what the importance of the objective is. But I am still driven to extreme annoyance; often after I go out in public and return thoroughly "cluster fucked". There are many, many occasions when I simply "lose it" after been cut out from former friendships and irradiated by way of the lesser symptoms noted above. I cannot trust anyone in my midst, and I cannot get any answers to what is being done to me.
To say that I am utterly outraged and exasperated beyond any limits of measure and tolerance is an understatement. That I am attempting to deal with a 40 year problem of Attention Deficit Disorder with depression, anxiety and cognitive problems matters not one whit to the state sponsored clinical terrorists that jumped on my back four years ago. And I surmise that my family, and my closest friends who were all converted to the criminal cause (i.e. quislings) don't particularly care one whit either.
To conclude, I have made two horrendous discoveries;
1) that supposed democratic countries, US and Canada, can and do select nonconsenting individuals for experimentation and harassment by uncommon technologies and then use psychiatric means to discredit them (as in the former Soviet Union) and
2) both countries have the means to apply covert and remote means of operationally applying dithering and debilitation to render anyone they choose in the guise of an seeming organic condition such as mental dysfunction to the levels of inducing lack of cognizant action and even suicide. That the professional clinical communities of both nations are activists in this endeavor is all the more horrifying to me.